ITS THURSDAY

no, i'm not dead. just busy. i haven't been ignoring you, just haven't felt the need to write. so here's what's up:

ITS THURSDAY.

i consider thursdays the best day of the week. let me count the ways:

1. grey's anatomy (even though i have to tape it)
2. ww weigh in. which means its:
3. binge night! i can eat whatever i want all night long for one night only!
4. its the one night i will allow myself to drink a little.
5. karoake.
6. design guild meetings.
7. maybe a stop at slims...its like coming home!
8. no homework. i get it done earlier in the week so i don't have to do it on thursdays.
9. lots of friends, lots of drunkeness...craziness.
10. sleepovers. i love them.

i'm sure i could ramble off more, but i'll stop there.

and this thursday, its my good friend stephanie's 22. even more reason to celebrate.

i'm in east side this weekend for a little concerto by the black eyed peas. you may have heard of them. then some quality time with the fam before coming back to homeworkville. and work. gross.

other than that...life is good. how's yours?

last first day of school

hopefully. that's the plan anyways. it was pretty boring too. woke up (tried to wake up and do the early morning work out thing but as always it never works), went to first class at 9, had an hour off, another class at 10, an hour off and then another class at 1. then i worked out, went to work for a few hours and then a habitat meeting. which i am no longer president of (so i could help train in the new president while i was still in college). it's going well.

and today is my little sister alli's bday. she is turning the fabulous age of 14. and if all goes well, she will get her long lost wish of getting a cell phone. i think it's the only thing she wants more than anything else in life.

so yeah...that was my day...

and saturday (on a side note) happened to be a lucky day for me. but not too lucky. off of 4 lotto tickets i won 10 dollars. and then i came home to find a scholarship check in the amount of 500 written out to me. i proceeded to buy a powerball ticket thinking that there was no way i could go wrong. but of course i didn't win. how freakishly weird would it had been if i did win?

what would you spend your millions on?

my top 3:

1. school
2. credit card debt
3. i would buy my self a house or a car or somthing...

and then some would go to certain organizations and the rest into some sort of bank investment where it can build over the years. and then i would retire early.

the end.

seriously though...tell me your top three. where would your millions go?

i have never found myself missing him more. i thought it was supposed to get better over time...and it hasn't. and i'm not possitive...but he may have taken a job in another city. i'll have to check on that. and if he has, i'll be really sad.

and for now...i want nothing to do with boys. none of them seem to want what i want...and that's just not cool.

i haven't had this much fun in weeks...

so how come i want to call him?

ummmm...spoiled.

i don't remember the last time i have ever been bought this many clothes.

my mom, sister and i did damage in fargo today and pretty sure the retail stores will be sending thank you letters for the amount we spent. it was pretty much better than christmas...and nothing is better than christmas.

i found some hot deals at old navy where i got a long sleeve tee, pj shorts (that say good morning sunshine), 2 skirts and a halter top all for 30 dollars. at aeo i scored some yoga pants and another skirt for 20. i also found the perfect bra today and got 2 of them (sorry if you didn't want to read that...but that's how much i love it), got a new pair of brown shoes, a pair of brown pants, black pants, twill pants and plaid pants, 2 button up blouses, a sweater and a tank...all bought by my mom. i don't know where she found the money but i can definetly say i'm grateful.

but i'm shopped out. too bed and tomorrow i'm back in btown to work!

lyrics on my mind

and if you love me, then tell me
all of the time
and can i love you, i want to
i want to try

You got soul, you got class.
You got style, with your badass - oh yeah!

not exactly high class songs...but they are on repeat in my head. they're just a little catchy. i want to dance every time i hear that christina song.

Hobson Memorial Union sponsored a team in the first-ever Lake Bemidji Dragon Boat Festival August 5th. Members of the "Beaver Tails" were: Brina Ellison, Jessie Taray, Cody Nelson, Lisa Farwell, Jeremy Anway, Andrew Cashin, Melissa Arneson, Glen Schmidt, Barb Butler, Sam Malloy, Petra Remeta, Mary Tosch, John Larson, Jose Hernandez, Brian Hudson, Rosin Shakya, Nima Lama, Bikram Ale, Gabe Wakanabo, Christina Kippenhan, T.Todd Masman, Tim Stoltenburg, Andrea Kroll, Seth Wymore, and Cory Haack The BSU team palced 18th out of 36 teams with a two-race, average time of 5:04.57, and a great time was had by all. --BSU TODAY

yup...i paddled a boat. it was so much fun. i'm telling you...you should be in a dragon boat race. besides the hard, grueling work...you'll have a great time.

i think i miss that team and working out phase of my life. it's gonna hit harder that ever with girls high school swimming season starting. but i plan to hit the pool hard core this fall...mmmm...chlorine!

sisterly love

i love hearing the words of my little innocent sister. she makes everything seem so...much smaller :) here's our convo as we were falling asleep last night.

alli: we took the boat down the mississippi on to lake irvine and stuff. it was cool.
andi: lake irvine? he lives on that lake.
alli: o really? that must be cool to live on a lake.
andi: yeah, it's nice...did i tell you i'm not with him any more?
alli: you aren't?
andi: nope. cheated on me again. i forgive once but not twice. people make mistakes but shouldn't make them twice.
alli: o.
andi: we might see him at the country club tomorrow.
alli: really...but i don't want to see him.
andi: eh, i wouldn't worry about it. it's not like we would acknowledge each other.
alli: can i beat him up for you?
andi: not at the country club. i can just see it now...alli all of a sudden tearing through the country club after him in an attempt to beat him up. he'd be like...what the hell? actually, if he got a good look at you he could probably tell who you were (we look remarkably alike for the 8 year difference).
alli: no, i don't think so. he seems to stupid for that.

haha...made me laugh :)

dragon boat queen

i've signed up to race in the big dragon boat festival this weekend. there's opening ceremonies and a parade tomorrow night and then i need to be at the "beaver dam" at 9:15 saturday morning to gear up to race. i really think we have a good chance of winning. unfortunatly, i have to work at 4 saturday so if we go into finals...i can't help win. i kind of like the rowing thing. in fact when i started college, if bsu had a rowing team, i so would have tried out for it. because rowing teams sound like so much fun. fact: i have never spent so much time on lake bemidji in one week. i like that there is actually things i can do out on the lake right now that are either free or cheap. fits my price range!

the ex is gone this week, which i think helps. i don't want to call him as often, or basically, i don't want any contact with him at all for awhile...just to see what it's like without him. i'm still confused with everthing thing as i know i can't go back to him...but what if, just for the hell of it...i did? what would happen? what would people think, say or do? right now they all tell me how to live my life...i'm just having a hard time trying to figure out if i'm desperate or if i do just want to be with him...because i can and i want to. it's confusing. i read this on another blog: "i'm fine with being me, but it's hard to be me without thinking about us." this person may have written this with a lot more meaning behind it...but really, i just lost a part of me.

so because of the whole thing in the above paragraph and because i have been confined to my glasses to at least the next 3 months...i have a morning spa appointment tomorrow. i'm getting a body wave put in my hair (ALLI DON'T TELL MOM) and then i'm going to get it cut and i'm going to see if they'll wax the eye brows too. apparently it's going to be a 3 to 4 hour procedure...and then i'm going to work at the btcc. woop woop.

ps....it's payday tomorrow. i think it will be a fantastic day :)

i don't mean to copy other people...

Which leads me to question the concept of right and wrong. This decision is certainly right for her, but not for the university. This sort of situation happens all the time in our everyday life. We constantly choose to either take a selfish course, or one that will make others happy. I guess you need both in your life to live a fulfilling life, but the balance is important. So how do you find this illusive balance? The world may never know.

I hate disappointing people, and that is what I have to do today. One way or the other. I wish I could clone myself (sometimes) and make everyone happy ... I guess something will work out.

I guess it always does.

katherine

...but it just seemed to express exactly what i was feeling.

blind (again)

i have to wear my glasses for the next 3 months. i hate this. good news: i get to pick out new glasses to be perscription sunglasses. that's about as good of news as it gets.

i'm still trying to figure out my love life. i spent time with him last night because i couldn't sleep so i stopped by his place and found him awake still. i'm not sure what i want to do with all this information i had. i have to figure out what i believe in i think...and then go from there. let's just remember that we aren't all innocent...and i think we still care a lot about each other.

I want to know why some people spend so much time analyzing friendships.
I'm confident in my ability to choose good friends, and choose acquaintances. I think I'm smart enough to figure out real friends from fake ones - long-lasting from short-term. It has to be exhausting to spend so much time wondering who cares about you. Maybe it's a confidence thing. I believe in myself. I'd be friends with me. Maybe if you wouldn't be friends with you, then you spend a lot of time wondering why anyone else would want to be.

-l.jo.

i want to know why some people spend so much time analyzing relationships. I'm confident in my ability to chose guys (though i haven't chosen one before...but i am CONFIDENT). and I'm smart enough to know what i am doing. i believe in myself. so lay off. so what if you aren't happy with the guy that i'm with. i don't want to hear it in 1000 different ways, shapes and forms. you're not spending time with us, so really, what do you know?

if i decide to go back with him, it will be a personal decision. some of my decision will be weighed on what advise i was given, what i had been told. but these matters are questions of the heart, mine, not yours. i will decide and what i decide, well, you'll have to be happy with it either way.

but one thing i have learned about myself...i don't like unwanted advise. i do things my own way. and no one knows better how to run my life than me.

so i'm posting. where's my dvd??

i was just going to stop it there, but figured since i'm on, might as well leave something.

i killed my eye again...and this time the blurriness isn't going away as fast, which means i might have to go to a specialist to see if there is an underlying problem...and it may mean glasses for a really long time. i hate my life.

went to the lake with my beloved squeak this weekend. it's good to have her back in the states. all we did all weekend was eat, watch movies, swim and sleep. it was so relaxing. i think our butt's are imprinted in the chairs.

i broke it off with the supposed boyfriend. but things are so confusing. becasue the reason that i broke it off with him might not actually be true. and it's also really confusing because we weren't really dating this time around. and i don't know what to do. i think we need to talk some more and only time will tell. i guess it's getting him to talk though and if he won't return the calls to talk...why waste my time on that? but i do miss him...we have such a good time together.

and that's all that's really in my life. lots of working and my room is always a mess. and it's hot. kind of wish the guy would call me back so that i could sleep at his house where it is cool.

it can only get better from here...

slacker

i know. but hey, it's summer. i wish that i could just open up word, type up my post and then hit a button that says post on blogspot. for some reason that seems faster and easier than logging in to blogger. i don't know.

but posting has become scarce due to the fact that i can no longer do it at one of my jobs and i hate my computer at home and only use it for correspondance during the night time hours. that and for storing all sorts of design projects, pictures and music. that's it. otherwise, it's loud and noisy (sometimes) and slow. and my desk is filled with crap and papers that i haven't quite figured out what to do with.

in other news, my birthday was last week and i turned the old age of 22. that's right. double deuce. and i still say i'm 21 when people ask. shoot. i'll get used to it. it was a good birthday except that i did get yelled at by a good friend. that did not please me, but we're working on it.

jenny left for florida yesterday. i'm not a crier, but i almost did shed some tears. she's my twin sister pretty much. i'll see her at xmas though.

my eye was better but then i wore black eyeliner (which i think is the source of my problems) and both my eyes are now red. i look like i was doing crack at dmb this last weekend...

which the concert (dave matthews band) was really good (and no i did not join in on the crack and pot fun that others, appeared, to be having. gross). i had such an amazing time. i'm really glad that zerek came with me because it allowed me to be a little comfortable around everyone. i think if he hadn't come with i would have retracted into my little shell. but zerek and i got to spend some quality time together and i got to go camping...and now that i'm back, i think i've had my camping fix for awhile. i hate porter potties and communal showers. but other than that, lots of fun, lots of stories. i'll post pictures later.

but now back to the work week! and pirates of the caribbean tonight plus thursday night vball and burgers at slims!

well...i'm back from atlanta. and then i blinded myself. i took out my contacts on thursday night and my eyes instantly started watering. i woke up on friday and kt and jenny both had to do a double take with the mass amount of swelling my eye did. i, thinking that it was just my normal eye problem, called in to work, found a replacement for the morning and said i should be good to go for the night shift. well...it was more than that. i ended up going to the doctor, he doesn't know what caused it exactly so i'm on drops and i've seen my doctor every day since friday so he can make sure there isn't an infection. and right now my eye is still so swollen that i can't see out of it. but it's much better. i'm hoping to get vision back by my bday...3 days!

just to let you know...

that atlanta is going so well, that i've pretty much been offered a job here after i graduate.

and not only that, but that if all goes well with the grant that they are giving us (the school), that they plan on opening an office up in bemidji.

and i told them that i would definitely be interested in working for them there.

i am so freaking excited!!

atlanta

well...atlanta is going well. i got naucious (sp?) on the landings on the plane but other than that, i'm good. i'm sitting in my hotel room and am loving it. i ate (not my weight erica...i held back) chinese with barb for diner and then we went exploring. then i went running and now i'm just chilling and watching some tv. my clock says midnight and i feel like it is midnight...but my body should be feeling 11. must have been all that travel. i'm excited to pimp myself and dress for success in my new black skirt and white and black stripped top. maybe all that chinese chicken? who knows. but i'll let you know about all my 3d holographic adventures tomorrow...

i hate mondays

well, they actually aren't all that bad, but i have so many problems in my life right now that this particular monday is bad. i'm hoping things will look up. that's why i like thursday and fridays...life always looks 10 times better by then.

to go along with the last post:

5 exciting things that are happening in your life:

1. i'm going to atlanta june 19-22 for 3dh training paid for by bsu!
2. at work i'm getting a new mac: 30 inch monitor, dual processor, wireless mouse and wireless keyboard.
3. running is getting a lot easier. i just have to keep at it.
4. i will be out of the money danger zone in one week!
5. today is thursday and tomorrow is friday: bring on the weekend!

5 Things
I was tagged by julie...thanks for making me update! here's my answers:

5 Things in my Fridge (it's pretty sad...)
1. summer sausage
2. potato salad
3. cheese
4. strawberries
5. ketchup

5 Things in my Closet
1. clothes
2. dirty clothes
3. all my eurospring memorabilia
4. my flute
5. loads of art supplies

5 Things in my Purse
1. Camera
2. cash (aka going out money...that doesn't really get spent)
3. Phone
4. Pens
5. ID and credit cards

5 Things in my Car
1. mardi gras beads
2. Car phone charger
3. sunglasses
4. all sorts of cds
5. golf clubs

5 Things I wish I was doing right now
1. sleeping
2. Making out!
3. Laughing louder
4. running...but #1 is outweighing this one
5. floating around in an outdoor pool

5 Things I like most about my bedroom
1. my big bed!
2. cy computer
3. Pictures of friends, family and travels
4. my martini glass collection
5. it's right across from kt's bedroom!

ahhhh...i tag:

katie
erica
alli